Wuf.

Every once in a while I catch myself while speaking and realize how silly I sound.  Since before I can remember I have always had trouble saying the word "wolf" or "wolves", it comes out much more like "wuf" and wufs".  Haha - I laugh even thinking about it.  The other day I was participating in a conversation at school about a story that had wolves in it and I think this is what I actually said . . . . "No, you're not grasping the validity of the point I am making - it has nothing to do with the WUFS . . . "  I then felt about four years old and I think I awkwardly tried to mumble the rest of my point - haha, it was a great moment.  Instead of feeling shame in my non-wolf saying abilities I am now owning it!  Yes, I say wuf or wufs and no I cannot change - - - - -I have tried!!

We Wear the Mask

This past week in class we read a poem that has stuck with me and maybe more than that, haunted me.  It was written in a different age for a different purpose, but for me, in this moment, it is for me -

We Wear the Mask

We wear the mask that grins and lies,

It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes, -

This debt we pay to human guile;

With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,

And mouth with myriad subleties.

Why should the world be overwise,

In counting all our tears and sighs?

Nay, let them only see us, while

We wear the mask.

We smile, but, O great Christ, our cries

To thee from tortured souls arise.

We sing, but oh the clay is vile

Beneath our feet, and long the mile;

But let the world dream otherwise,

We wear the mask!

Paul Laurence Dunbar

My mask is wearing thin and I am weary.  Not only of mine but of those I see all around.

el año pasado y el año que viene . . .

It has been a great few weeks.  I went to Indiana to visit Mario and Wendy the first part of December.  I was able to stay two weeks and had the hardest time leaving them, especially little Ethan.  While we were there we went up to Chicago for two days and it was the greatest.  I am going to live there some day.  I loved it.

I love this shot.  It's at the top of the John Hancock building.I didn't even know Mario was taking a picture, it has a melancholy feeling but interesting at the same time.

View from the top - the John Hancock top.

Mario and I showing off our skating skills - I bet you all are so impressed:)

Me and the Bean

The famous Chicago sign and me:)

Ethan and I working on our gingerbread houses

Wendy and her hot blond hair working on the GBH

on the morning that Ethan opened the Christmas presents from Utah and me getting to read Thomas to this cute kid

This boy rocks!!  Here he is trying on new clothes from Chard's #2 but keeping on his trademark socks - he wears either green or orange but that day he wanted one of each - so cool!

E. and his trains!!!  He was obsessed with trains and Thomas - he knew all the character names and could play for hours.  I miss this little one!

My last Sunday there - our Christmas picture:)

E. playing in the snow! - they didn't have very much and his playing consisted of walking around but man he is cute

This shot is especially for Papa - he was coming home to Utah with me!

It was such a great trip and then I got to come home to a very relaxing Christmas and New Years.  Tomorrow the real world starts again - work, school, life.  I'm not sure I'm prepared for it but I guess it's time to move forward and see what this new year can bring.