I had an experience tonight that I want to share. I do so
only in the hopes to perpetuate the idea that love and kindness can make an
impact in the world. There seems to be so much ridicule in our day and age, to
be mean to others can often be seen as witty or a form of entertainment. Why do
we seek to make ourselves feel better by hurting another? I don’t know how we
got there but I do know the power is in each of us to change that pattern, to
make the lives of those we come in contact with brighter and better because we
choose kindness not hated.
I went for a walk tonight. Getting healthy and losing weight
has been a battle I have waged since high school. I am sensitive about this
battle and often I am my worst enemy. When I am home in Morgan I love to walk
on Old Highway Road; there are just enough hills to make it interesting and the
view is amazing. My one fear has always been the many cars that pass that way. My
fear is not of getting hit by a car but being judged by the people in it. I
grew up experiencing much unkindness about my being overweight. I became hyper
sensitive to those around me and believed that if one person disliked me for
that then all people did. I remember the first time I decided to walk that
particular road and the courage it took to not turn around, to keep going
forward.
I felt that need for courage tonight as, midway through my
walk, a car of young boys drove by and slowed down. They laughed and pointed
and made fun of me for being overweight. They thought themselves clever and
sped off laughing and celebrating their ability to point out the perceived
fault of another. I felt embarrassed and thought back to all the times in my
life that I allowed those similar acts of unkindness to define who I was. For a
moment I wanted to turn around, to give up and stop something I loved for fear
that more of the same unkindness must surely be around the corner.
Luckily those thoughts only lasted for a moment. Soon I was
thinking about how hard I had worked to get where I was and how much more work
there was left to do. I thought about how foolish it would be to let the words
and actions of others I didn’t even know stop my course. I also thought of all
the great people who have shown me kindness and encouraged me in all stages of
my life. I thought about a man from my parent’s ward, Jerry Stout, who always
seems to drive by when I am walking – he waves and honks and gives me a thumbs
up and it keeps me going. I thought about great teachers, leaders and friends
who choose to look past my weaknesses and see the best in me and what I can
become. I thought about the truthfulness in this quote from Elder Joseph B.
Wirthlin:
“Kindness is the essence of greatness and the
fundamental characteristic of the noblest men and women I have known. Kindness
is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends. It softens hearts and
molds relationships that can last lifetimes.”
The world needs greatness in the form of kindness
more than almost anything else. Think of the lives that could be blessed and
the changes that would come if we were all a little nicer to each other. I
think of the poor kids who commit suicide because of bullying; I think of the
acts of racial prejudice that divide communities and countries because
differences are focused on instead of what is shared; I think of the emotional
and mental scars that children carry into adulthood because of constant
negativity from parents or friends. It is often thought and said that one
person cannot make a difference, the ripple effect of one small stone in a pond
as big as the world would be miniscule so don’t even try - but that thought, my
friends, is a lie; don’t believe it, don’t teach your children it and don’t let
it be spread and shared around you without standing up to it.
So, tonight or tomorrow or a week from now, if there
is the choice between being unkind and breaking someone down or building
another up and showing kindness – choose kindness. See the good in others and
yourself and I promise change can come. I have seen it in my life and through
the lives of others – one person makes a difference, one person saves lives. I
challenge myself as much as others. If there is someone who has experiences unkindness
at my hand, please accept my deepest apologies and know that I will try the
rest of my life to make it up to you by choosing kindness.
Do something good for another; you will never know
what can come of it . . .
